Footloose and Fancy....

Free.

Hilarious story: someone actually called himself "footloose and fancy." And stopped right there. And he is of the male persuasion. I always thought that was funny.

So, I am officially done with having to attend classes, at least until June. We did our poster session thing today. I also turned in my re-done literature review (hallelujah!) and also got my take-home test back from a few weeks ago. And the amazing Nilla got a 15+ out of 15. Woohoo! I think I impressed her, because she made a point to come to me and say, "You did really well on the test." At the end of it, she said, "Excellent work Hila!" in big letters. And it was peppered with positive remarks throughout the test. I'm feeling all warm inside ;). So, perhaps after all the sweat and tears, I will come out okay in there...

So, you know how in literature, there are usually motifs or themes? I wonder if our lives are sometimes like that, when there is a recurring theme or something we are supposed to learn, so it keeps popping up. If that is the case, the current theme for my life is "Learn to live in the NOW." Not only was this mentioned in General Conference a few weeks back by Elder Ballard who suggested that we should enjoy the now when he quoted author Anna Quindlen who said, "...I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.” But it is also part of the First Presidency message for the month of April, where Pres. Monson counseled us to learn from the past, prepare for the future, and live in the present. And if that weren't enough, I also read it in this wonderful book titled Daddy-Long-Legs. Who knew there would be such wisdom couched in a cute juvenile book? Here is what "Jerusha" tells Daddy-Long-Legs in a letter: "It isn't the great big pleasures that count the most; it's making a great deal out of the little ones -- I've discovered the true secret to happiness, Daddy, and that is to live in the now. Not to be forever regretting the past, or anticipating the future; but to get the most that you can out of this very instant." And do you know I fear I am terribly guilty of anticipating the future to the point where I play out multiple scenarios in my mind daily? Do you know that I have described my time here (this past year and a half) as "limbo-like;" a time where I was just "passing through" and waiting for my life to begin again? I will say I have become better at just going and doing and living in the moment a little bit more, and without guilt (like taking spontaneous trips to Seattle, for example). But I remain fraught with concern over the future and what it holds. I must learn to let go. To do the things I know are right and allow myself to be led and trust that it will be all that my heart desires. And in the mean-time, live in the now. And perhaps I needed to see that motif, or theme, pop up multiple times in the last month in order to "get it." Hopefully now that I've recognized it, I can learn to implement it. Not a thing of ease for a person such as the Nilla who clings desperately to some false sense of control over issues she cannot control at all... Seems silly, doesn't it? And yet, that is me :). So, in my attempts at living in the NOW, my new adventure is almost sure...

I am nearly 100% positive I am going to Panama. My dad called today to inform me that he spoke with the family friends that still live in Panama. The wife said she was sure we'd be able to stay with them. Now all I have to do is buy the tickets... with my dad's credit card. Haha ;). Oh yeah, and the other way I'm going to live in the NOW? Why, I think I will purchase Trivial Pursuit 80s edition, because I found it for $10 through Amazon.com. Brand-spankin' new, at that. So, get ready to get whooped... (unless there is a ridiculous sports category).

And, because I feel I should leave you with some more great thoughts from Daddy-Long-Legs that made me laugh:
"And as for Florence, she is hopeless -- but, oh! such a little beauty. I don't suppose it matters in the least whether they are stupid or not so long as they are pretty. One can't help thinking though how their conversation will bore their husbands, unless they are fortunate enough to obtain stupid husbands. I suppose that's quite possible; the world seems to be filled with stupid men; I've met a number this summer."

It made me laugh... Probably because it's something I would at least think, even if I didn't say it out loud (but I probably would say it out loud to someone I knew would agree with me!).

*Oh yeah, and Elka also guessed the movie quote!*