[2010 Was Not] A Very Good Year

We are only a few hours away from sending 2010 packing. And I don't think I have ever been so glad to see a year go. For those of you who had a great 2010, I'm truly happy for you. For me, however, 2010 was not a very good year. Which is the opposite of what Frankie is singing here. But I take creative freedoms.

I turned 30 in 2010. It's a milestone. And I'm nowhere where I wanted to be. In any aspect of being. I guess I could be grateful that I am still upright. But beyond that, I am not at all where I thought I would be at 30. And that is hard. Because I'm not even close.

I applied for 11 jobs this year. Both in-state and out-of-state. Both within my field of education and out of it. I got called to interview for one. I got offered none.

The health insurance costs at the library job have started going up. So my paycheck has started going down. And since my hours at the funeral home are now going down too, in the name of the bottom line, that check is shrinking also.

My 16 year old car is starting to really fall apart. And it's not just cosmetic anymore. I spent $500 on snow tires. I spent almost $700 on new brakes. And it's still leaking coolant somewhere, so I drive around with 2 gallons of coolant in my car, because I have to refill it about once a week. Remember a few weeks ago when I wrote that it took me 10 minutes to get into my car because of the hard freeze that wouldn't allow me to even unlock my doors? Well that happened again last night. Only this time, when I managed to get the driver's side door open, something happened with the lock or the latch freezing in place, and it wouldn't shut, but would slam against the hook thingie and open back up. Makes it kind of hard to drive around when your door won't shut. And I lost it. I stood out there in the freezing cold morning with my car running and a door that wouldn't shut, and I bawled my eyes out. Thankfully Lea worked the same shift, so she came and picked me up. And thankfully her husband was off today, so he came over and looked at it. And he fixed it. And bought de-icer and lubricant. Which I had to use again tonight, since the door did the same thing, since it is again way way below freezing. I think I will eventually be climing in and out of the passenger side. It gets more ghetto by the day.

And let's not even get started on the drama that is living near family.

Overall, I did not enjoy 2010. It has been a very hard and trying year for me. And I'm not sure what to do with that.

The year wasn't a total bust, though. There were highlights. Like a new friendship that brought new traditions and people who are so willing to help when I have issues like frozen door locks. Like a trip to the Oregon Coast with my mom. Like a trip to Savannah, Georgia with Julie. Like getting a job with health insurance. Like managing to achieve several of the goals I set for myself this year, including getting out of debt.

So it's not that my 2010 was completely void of good moments. It's just that those good moments are quite overshadowed by the really dark hard moments, of which there were so many.

As I was pondering all this today at the library, I had the thought that perhaps life would be easier if we just used seashells for currency like they do on The Flintstones. And then I laughed to myself as I thought, "Shoot, I'd be having a yabba dabba do time too if I could pay with seashells!" Granted, a lot of issues can't be solved with money. But a lot of them can. And right now, this economy could use some seashell currency.

The truth is, whenever I write a blog post like this, I feel guilty. I know I should be grateful for the things that are "right" and not be so concerned with what, in my opinion, isn't. But the other truth is that these things I have written are as much a part of me and my life right now as anything else I've ever written. And maybe one day, hopefully with the good fortune of perspective, I will be able to read over this blog post and remember how I felt, and maybe -- hopefully -- I will be able to understand why I had to endure a year such as this. So whether I feel guilty for writing it or not, I'm leaving it. Because you get the whole Nilla Life. Crazy and all.

Pieces of Me

So one of my "projects" of late has been to organize paperwork. Gasp! Funny how I sort of do that for one of my jobs, but I allow my own personal paperwork to exist in such disarray! And, as with many of my projects, this one has been put to the back burner, brought to the front, put back to the back... You get the picture. Monday night I pulled it back to the front. And let me tell you that it's quite the undertaking. I have a file box into which I just shoved stuff. Pay stubs (from 4 different jobs now so far...), tax papers, dental records, medical records, etc etc etc. Plus various greeting cards I've received. They are all just thrown into this box that I tote around with me from home to home. I guess, in a sense, it's the minutiae of me. Or pieces. I actually changed the title of this blog post just so I could make it a song title post ;). It was a hard choice, actually. I could either make my title alliterative, which I love to do; or I could make it song-ative ;). Which I also love. Music won out. It usually does.

Anyway, so here are a few of the treasures that came out of "the box" that I was surprised to see. Mostly because I forgot about most of them. And because some of the others I would like to forget... Hahaha.

"Fun" item number 1: My divorce decree. Now there's a good time. I have read more than one divorce decree in my life (only one of them being mine -- but it's amazing what they have in some cemetery files...), and I'll tell you what: I don't believe there exists a divorce decree that doesn't leave you feeling empty inside after you read it, even if you don't know the person(s) to whom it applied. The most ironic statement in mine states that it will be as if the marriage never existed. Well, obviously they are speaking of legally and financially. Because for the rest of my life, no matter what else happens, I will have always been married and I will always be divorced. I wouldn't mind if that piece of paper had some magical power to undo the past and make it a true statement emotionally and mentally as well. But it doesn't. So I snub my nose at that ridiculous statement in my divorce decree. Because, again, no matter what else happens, there will always be that sore spot in my heart created by a divorce that did break my heart. And I can never undo that or pretend it didn't exist.

Fun item number 2: A very small receipt that fell out of some tax papers from the years I was in Tuscaloosa (which makes it even more baffling). It's from June 2, 2005 at 9:29 (I assume in the morning) and is from the TSUD bookstore. Which no longer exists (to my knowledge anyway) since they turned that into Barnes & Noble (I think) when TSUD became part of "One Great University" now known as Troy University (where Spring Break never ends, if you believe their radio advertisement from a few years back... I'm not really sure that's something I would advertise...). Hahaha. Anyway, I don't know what I bought there, but it was $45.00. Plus tax. And I'm sure it was a textbook for one of my classes.

Fun item number 3: A printout of my blog post for March 5, 2008! I was once toying with the idea of printing my blog. For keepsake purposes, since it was sort of like a journal. I mean, I used to post daily! So I printed out that blog post to see how long it would be and what it would look like. Well, I realized quickly this would be something that would be costly and use up way too much paper and ink. Maybe if I was less wordy...? Anyway, but I kept the one I did print. It was fun to read over it (even though I could always go back and read my own archives online). I wasn't living in Washington yet, and I was missing my family terribly. My movie quote for the week was from Pretty In Pink. I was in the middle of Strive For Five and had lost a cumulative of .8 pounds by week 8. And my quote of the day (I was changing quotes daily back then) was all about family. And Elka had left something like 4 comments on that post trying to guess what "Baby's" (from Dirty Dancing) real first name was in the movie.

Fun item number 4: My MAT scores. I had totally forgotten I took the MAT for graduate school! MAT stands for Miller Analogies Test. So I took a test with a bunch of analogies with everything from math to English to History to Science. Fun stuff. But I heard that was better than the GRE, so I opted for the analogies! I scored in the 80-something percentile, which doesn't seem too great to me, but I guess it was good enough ;). I also found the letter I had written to attempt to be accepted into the online MLIS program in early 2006. I was not admitted to the online program, of course. My life took a different path altogether and I ended up moving to Tuscaloosa. And I found a letter announcing the bestowal of a scholarship for Graduate School plus a letter announcing my raise of merit for the school year 2007-2008 (for my job at UA).

Fun item number 5: An assignment from Graduate School. I had to prepare a curriculum assignment and I'm thinking it was for Materials and Services for Children. I chose to do a program on America's Declaration of Independence. I had to lay out activities and objectives, mention books I would use, and assignments I would give in various areas such as creative writing and research. Reading it over tonight, I was pretty surprised I had produced such an item! It sounded really good to me! Hahaha. Maybe I copied some smart teacher's plan... ;).

Of course, I haven't finished going through the box of treasures yet. But I'm done for the night. I am trying to decide how long I should keep past insurance claims (dental and medical). And old check stubs. I know they say to keep tax stuff 7 years back. Would work paycheck stubs fall into that category? Any thoughts?

So there you have it. A few pieces of me. Some of which even I had forgotten ;).

Christmas 2010

Christmas seemed to come fast this year. And now it's gone. Seems weird. One reason it was particularly nice was because of the days Christmas Eve and Christmas Day fell on. I am enjoying a 4-day weekend from the library job and a 3-day weekend (which is now wrapping up) from the funeral home. I house-sat for Bob Friday and Saturday nights. He and his wife gave me a gift card to Target. Ben, Michele, Tony, and Royce came by on Friday for us to exchange gifts. They got me this really cool gardening book, which I am sure I will be referring to often in the upcoming year! I also made the beginnings of cinnamon rolls that have to sit in the refrigerator overnight.

Saturday morning I woke up around 8 and got dressed and ready for the day. I pulled out the cinnamon rolls and the glaze and headed to Lea's house. They had invited me over to exchange gifts and eat breakfast and I offered to bring homemade cinnamon rolls. So Lea got me a hair crimper for the next time I rock the 80s. And her whole family got me a travel-crock pot! It's nice and big (6 quarts) and it has a sealed locking lid with big side handles so that you won't spill soup on your car!!! (I did that once on a Monday Meal night...)

I got her family and also Dan each a place setting. Again inspired by Marvelous Monday Meals. Lea has always said the pictures in the facebook album all have her old chipped plates. So I got new plates for everyone (including myself). They thought this was a really cool gift. So that was neat.

We enjoyed hot-out-of-the-oven, homemade cinnamon rolls on our new plates.

And then we watched about 3 or 4 episodes of the new season of Glee. I was a little behind because of the fact I had to wait for it to come from the hold list at the library.

I opened all my packages and stuff I've been saving for Christmas. Sue (I work with her at the funeral home and walk with her as well) got me nifty mittens/gloves. They are really cool, because you slide them on as fingerless gloves and then there's this "pocket" thing you turn over onto your fingers so it's more like a mitten. Very cool. April sent 2 boxes of Jelly Bellys. One with the possibility of getting either the normal flavor or a look-alike that is actually gross. Like buttered popcorn/rotten egg; chocolate pudding/pencil shavings; or strawberry jam/centipede. I got enough gross ones to last me tonight, so I stopped eating those ;). The other has 5 specialty mixes like all berry; soda shoppe; Coldstone Creamery; Smoothie Blend; and Citrus mix. I really like the berry ones. I love Jelly Bellys as a whole though :). She also sent this awesomely 80s book that looks like a trapper keeper (it opens up like one) and has articles (witty funny ones) about all these 80s toys and cool stuff. Think He-Man; She-Ra; Pogo Balls; Garbage Pail Kids... I don't know where she finds all this 80s stuff she sends, but it's awesome! And from Julie, I got a "Peas in a Pod" box for memories. And the box itself is a memory! Since she and I used to refer to ourselves as two little peas in a pod (the grey, slightly misshapen ones ;)). She also sent a cookbook, and two "fru-fru" things for when I have my own place. (She has to be my interior decorator, because I have a huge hole where that gene is supposed to be....). One is a framed picture of The Lord's Prayer and the other is a 3-candle holder with a scripture verse on it. Very pretty and I think they will match whatever style I manage to have ;). And I'll put vanilla candles in those holders, Julie ;). You did give me permission in the card :). So yeah, some very awesome gifts!

Then it was time for family Christmas. We opted to do finger foods. But I think we still went overkill. Here's our spread. We had pigs in a blanket, cheese olivettes, empanditas, spinach dip with veggies, cheese spreads with crackers, chocolate chip pumpkin bread, oreo truffles, red velvet truffles, puppy chow, pigeon poop, almond roca, and cinnamon gingerbread muffins. I was going to make the bacon cheese mini appetizers, but I think we had plenty of food even without them. Those will be made another day, since the filling is all mixed and the dough is bought...

Here are Brad, Tarylyn, Saria, and Benjamin eating.

Then it was present time. I didn't end up getting a good shot of Samuel that wasn't sideways (and therefore requiring more work to upload here since I'd have to put it on my computer and flip it, so I just included him in a group one). Here is Emily with the Sing-a-Majig I got her. Those things are asesome.

Christina and Nick. I got Christina a book. She likes the murder mystery types, and I read this one years ago, so thought I'd buy it for her and hopefully she will like it. She reads really fast, so if nothing else, it's something for her to try.

Here is Desiree with all the flower clips Aunt Tarylyn made for her and Emily. She is such a pretty little girl.

And here are 4 of the 5 kids watching presents get opened. I think this was Saria with her Justin Bieber bear with money stuffed in it (by my mom). Which, now that I've thought about it, that's kind of funny. I will have to ask my mom if the bear stripped for her ;). If I spelled his name right. She's "in love" with Justin Bieber (Saria is, not my mom).

Benjamin (and Samuel) got nerf guns.

Saria (and Desiree) got these pink educational laptops. So did the boys (only they were blue) and Emily got one too for her age.

I got new scriptures and a tote for them, pajamas, and a box of chocolates, and goodies made by Tarylyn. After we were done with Christmas and cleaning up, I went back to Bob's and chilled and enjoyed control of the tv remote. The cats don't seem to mind ;). So we watched Scrooged.

And because I think I love this version of the song by the Glee cast (probably means more if you have seen the episode), listen here to I Want To Hold Your Hand.

Today I...

...slept until I woke up on my own. Which was at 9:00.

...didn't go to work (either of them), because I had a dentist appointment.

...spent 10 minutes trying to get into my car. We had a hard-freeze last night, and the locks to my car were frozen. Fun.

...bought a black blazer from St. Vinny's for $2.50. And by blazer, I mean the jacket variety. Not the awesome 4-wheeled variety. But if they had one of those for $2.50, I'd have probably bought that too :).

...went to the dentist and got a tooth yanked out of my head. My other top wisdom tooth (well, the other other one got pulled years ago in Dothan for the same reason) had a cavity and they recommended pulling it, because where they are tends to make them prone to cavities (since they are hard to reach). It cost me $1 less to pull it than fill it, and if I filled it and then had more problems later, that would make it even more costly. So I pulled it. This was a much better experience than last time. The had the tooth out in less time than it took the Counting Crows to finish singing Round Here on my Zune. Seriously. Sure, I heard a little bit of stuff and felt them pulling a bit. A small bit of pressure. But I'd had the procedure done before, so I was totally anticipating the horrible cracking sounds by my ear that I experienced last time. I was pleasantly surprised :). Less than 3 minutes. Worst part was getting the shot in the roof of my mouth. Well, and then the changing of the gauze stuff afterwards. Gross. But now I just have a hole in my mouth. Which will heal in time.

...stopped by Brad and Tarylyn's since I was over on their side of town and saw the kids for a few minutes. They had half day today since it is the beginning of Christmas Break for them.

...went to the Temple with Janise and Wendy and met up with Amalea there.

...went to the Cheesecake Factory on the way home from the Temple. Tried a new cheesecake (in the interest of not having hard stuff that might be detrimental to the hole in my head that had stopped bleeding by this point... I didn't want to start that process again, trust me). I had the chocolate peanut butter one with the chocolate cake layer. It's yum. I never finish all my meal or cheesecake, so I brought the leftovers home to my mom. I got the cajun chicken littles like I usually do, but I'm definitely not getting those again. They have changed the recipe and they are more bland. But dessert was awesome. As always. And the food wasn't bad. Just not as totally awesome as it used to be -- as far as that meal is concerned. But I did learn that they make awesome sweet potato fries!!! I will be getting those in the future.

...want to read some more in The Dead and the Gone, which is the second book in the series about the moon getting hit by a meteor and gets knocked closer in orbit to the Earth and this changes everything... Am loving this series.

...am tired. And so I will stop blogging. I will read from the above-mentioned novel. And I will go to bed.

...am done.

Christmases of Yore

I don't know why, but sometimes when I listen to Christmas music, I get flashbacks of Christmases of yore. And so I thought I'd share a few...

Helping the Boy Scout Troop (of which Brad was a part) selling Christmas trees on Albrook AFB in Panama. Outside for hours. Bored. And it wasn't cold at Christmas time in Panama. So I was also sweaty. And a teenager. You can imagine the complaining :).

Having the day off of work from Troy and putting up the Christmas decorations on Veteran's Day. That is the earliest I think I've ever decorated (or my family, for that matter). But that was the year we were coming to Washington for Thanksgiving, so I figured that would give us a few extra days to enjoy the Christmas feeling. And it was nice, to tell the truth.

HLML Christmas party in the community room -- potluck -- with gift wrapping of Angel Tree presents afterwards. And shopping for those Angel Tree presents, for that matter. I remember going with a few other library folk one year and picking out presents at Wal-Mart (could there be any other place for our shopping needs!?!) I'm pretty sure we took Big Blue the station wagon, too...

Christmas Decorating Day in Panama. This was the day we got the tree (if we opted for real) or put up the artificial tree. And we decorated. The tree always stood in the same general area. Slightly to the right of the living room air conditioner. Some years we would put out the little village with Christmas lights that would make them light up. Some years we wouldn't. But we always pulled out all the Christmas boxes from the walk-in closet. (That walk-in closet is a memory for another time... But that little room was awesome. There were treasures in there, let me tell you. Treasures in my own house...). And we always put up my mom's special crystal ornaments. And I think this day is the reason Christmas music makes me think of this day. Because out would come the Christmas music. Records for the first several years of my life (and memory). And then CDs as the years went on. Never much of the cassette tapes, except in the car. (And mostly from that I remember a song with someone screeching 'I wanna bicycle!' and hearing that from the way back of the Pinto...). But always on Christmas Decorating Day my mom would put on Christmas music the whole day. Some days I wish I could go back and drink it all in.

Sleeping on the futon mattress in front of the Christmas Tree. And being woken up in the morning by the mailman delivering last-minute Christmas gifts we had ordered.

I think it's true what Oscar Wilde said: "Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us." Because these are certainly written on my heart forever.

A Box of Chocolates

So little miss Emily turned 2 today. She is so funny. I took a few pictures, but here are two of them to represent :). I gave her this toy camera. It makes plenty of noise, which is the kind of gift parents love to have their children receive :)).

And here's the face of a kid who doesn't like to be told no. Or don't. Hahaha. Poor thing. Actually, I was feeding her cake (her own piece, mind you) and then her daddy sat down on the couch and she wanted his, so I said, "No baby girl, this one is yours." This face was the result. She got over it in a jiffy when Christina pointed to the bite I had on her spoon for her and said, "Bite!" She ate her bite and was happy again. But I do love her facial expressions!

As for the rest of life... It's been an interesting week. There has been a lot of rain falling. And I mean that totally literally. No metaphors this time ;). In fact, there are flood warnings for all the rivers in Western Washington tonight and tomorrow. And generally speaking, I'd prefer to have the rain than the snow. Of course, this also brings the flooded floorboard in my ghetto car. Oh my poor car. It's so old. And it's now costing me a lot of money. Today I took it in and got the brakes done. And that was expensive. Very. When they called and gave me the estimate, I was so frustrated. And wanted to cry. But the good news is that I do have the money saved up. And financially, this is the best time in my life for it to happen. I'm out of debt, and I have the money to pay for it. It's just frustrating to save up money for other things and then have to spend it on "necessary" things... But, oh well. At least I'm driving around safe now. And then, when I got home from my day of shopping, I had a check in the mail for participating in healthy living habits stuff through my library job. So the insurance pool pays people who participate $125. Woohoo! So I kind of got back some of the money from the brakes! And since I had won $50 in gift certificates last night at the Christmas party for the funeral home... Well, I didn't spend any money today except on my car. The Christmas party at the funeral home was really fun. We had awesome food. We did a potluck, except the location bought a ham and roast. We had a great turnout and just enjoyed phenomenal food (scalloped potatoes, mashed potatoes, punch, apple crisp, pumpkin pie, apple pie, jello, cheesecake, baked beans, cole slaw, rice, spring rolls, deer sausage with cheese and crackers, rolls, green bean casserole...). We played a couple of games at the end. One of them was called Noah's Ark where everyone got a slip of paper that had an animal written on it. We had to go around and act like that animal and find our match and be the first in line with Noah. Hahaha... I got pig! My mom got ape. Other funny ones were monkey and chicken. We laughed so hard! We also played a game where you pass a quarter from hand to hand with the people next to you. The people on the other side of the table say when to stop and then guess who has the coin. It was pretty hilarious. Then a few of us stayed and cleaned up and visited for about an hour afterwards, and we told stories and laughed even more. So all in all, it was a great time!

Today I took the day off work from the library. Because I wanted to. Just needed a break. Plus I needed to take my car in, because it needed a brake (or three ;)). okay, okay, bad joke. So sue me. So after taking my car in, my mom and I went to a sports compound here where my friend's daughter works concessions and we bought smoothies (cold drinks on cold days... weird, but yummy). We went by the funeral home to pick up something I forgot last night. We went to the bank and stood in line for what seemed like forever. We went to Costco, which was a madhouse... And I didn't even end up buying anything, because I wasn't impressed with their selection of "select Disney DVDs" that I could get for $6 off. And then we went into Best Buy to see my sister and say hi. Then to Fred Meyer to do some grocery shopping (mostly for Marvelous Monday Meals). Then home for a bit until my car was ready.

I finished another book last night. It's called An American Summer. I loved it. The language in it was rough, and there was a pretty horrible scene in it. Not graphic in description that much, but definitely a horrible thing. But the book was really great. It had some very poignant moments and I think one of my favorite lines from the book is when Christy (a 14 year old boy) realizes through his friendship with Kathryn (a 23 year old woman who got polio and was now in an iron lung), "I was amazed at how wonderful I felt because I really hadn't understood, until that moment, how I had it in my power to make happy another person on the face of this Earth." In spite of the rougher parts of this novel, this was a feel-good story, and I'm so glad I read it.

Anyway, it's been a good week. Good, but interesting. My life is looking like it's going to take some interesting turns. And so I will agree with Forrest Gump: "Life is like a box of chocolates... You never know what you're gonna get." Stay tuned...

It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas!

Well this is mostly just a picture dump. More pictures from Thanksgiving. From Christina's camera. These are all from after dinner. I did some filming of the kids (aren't you proud, Dad?), and they were very excited to get to watch the video we had just filmed. So we sat on the kitchen floor and watched it on the mini-screen. And they thought it was so hilarious.

Emily had been wearing this necklace around her neck. I don't know if it is a pen or something. But it lights up. Anyway, so she brought it to me, so I tried to put it around my neck. Alas, my head is melon-size, and it didn't fit. So we ended up with this.

Saria and I talked books. And I talk a lot with my hands, as evidenced in this picture.

And then we all posed with plastic vampire teeth. Even me. And even Emily. Which was hilarious.

Toddler hugs and kisses sure are sweet.

And the Christmas parties begin... Which is why it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas :). Tonight was the library Christmas party. We were a small group, but we had fun. We did a potluck, which was delicious; an ornament exchange; a cookie exchange, which is always awesome; and played Apples to Apples and had a lot of fun with that! Here we all are posing with out ornaments.

Deep Thought as I spent time looking at the pictures from Christina: though I imagined my life at this point as being quite different than it actually is, it occurred to me this week that if I was married with children as I always dreamed of being by 30, I would not have the relationship I have with my nieces and nephews. They bring such joy to my life. And you know what? I wouldn't trade it for anything. There is still time for me to be a mommy one day. Until then, I will enjoy being the cool aunt. Because seeing the joy in the eyes of these beautiful children and knowing them as well as I do... It is so worth it :).

Ti-i-i-i-me [Ain't] On My Side

So time ain't on my side. I have too much to do. Too little time. Things like blogging have fallen to the wayside lately. And when I have family pictures to post so my dad can see them, I probably should make it more of a priority. But somehow my life is full of things that need doing. Even my reading has been moved to the back burner. And that kind of irritates me. So here's a little catch-up post :). Sometimes, when I do song title posts, I learn a lot. Because I totally didn't know this song was by the Rolling Stones.

So Thanksgiving was pretty good. Okay, well. The part where we all got there and got to the eating part. I think I'm too high strung for Thanksgiving. It has too much chaos, and I get grouchy. I think I may be part Grinch. So I went over to Brad and Tarylyn's first and took a lot of the stuff over. And then the kids and I hung out until everyone else arrived. Which wasn't long. But here is Samuel with me. Poor kid. He was licking his chapped lips like crazy and ended up with a bunch of canker sores. So sad. But isn't he just the cutest? I can't believe he's 6 1/2 now. I remember being there the day after he was born. My how the time flies.
This is the only picture I got of Benjamin, other than the group shot, and you can't even see his face. In this picture, he and Emily were hugging. Thank goodness for my sister who took pictures with my camera. Because other than the self-portraits and the group shot at the end, I didn't take any of the other pictures... I'm such a slacker!

While we were waiting for the food to finish cooking, the kids and I watched some videos on the computer. Look at my sweet Desiree. She is such a sweet girl. I mean so incredibly sweet. And she's so pretty. How I love her. Is it possible this is the little tiny baby they wheeled into the room all bundled up?

And here I am with Saria, Desiree, and Samuel. Saria is quite the beauty. She is incredibly photogenic. She will be 10 soon. How does this happen? I was there when Tarylyn was in labor with her, though I did have to go to work (the HLML book sale...) before Saria was born. But I saw her that very night. And then, not even 2 years later, right before my wedding, this sweet thing was there, calling the Wizard of Oz "kai!" Don't know why, but she was consistent with it. And now look at her! She is beautiful! And of course, sweet Desiree again and handsome Samuel. How I love these kids! They make my day every time I see them. How thankful I am to be their aunt. On Thanksgiving and every day. They so enrich my life.

Dinner was ready shortly after these pictures were taken. Desiree told me she wanted to eat next to me. Which meant I ate in the kitchen with the kids. Because other than Emily who was being fed and was therefore able to eat with the grown-ups, all the other kids ate in the kitchen. So Aunt Hila did too. And Samuel didn't want his sweet potatoes or his green bean casserole, but was told he had to eat it. So Aunt Hila broke out the big guns and introduced them to the childhood game that Brad, Christina, and I made up. We call it: "When I take a bite, they put me like this..." And let me just say, the kids loved it. Saria had finished her food, but she decided to eat more bread and then pretend to eat just so she could participate! And Desiree was doing a good job of eating her food anyway and not complaining about it, but she also wanted to participate. They had so much fun with it! These kids are just, in a word, awesome. They make me laugh. And I told Brad what they were doing when he came in the kitchen and he just laughed. Because it's exciting for the kids for sure. But it's fun for us too, because it brings back memories of our own. Of days sitting at the formica-covered kitchen table, eating the potato soup we didn't like out of the little green bowls. I have that mental image every time I think of this game.

And here's little Emily. Emily who will be 2 in 11 days. Emily who loves books. And who can now point at a pumpkin and say "punkin." And at a rock and say "rock!" Her vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds, and everytime I go without seeing her for more than a week, it feels like she advances so much it astounds me! I know that is what they do at this age. It's just amazing to see it. And actually, Emily is the first niece or nephew I've seen go through this stage. The others didn't live near enough to me at this age for me to see their daily and weekly advancements. Anyway, in this picture, she had taken a book to her grandma to read, and she was just happy as a clam to sit there and listen to the story. She's so pretty.

We were getting ready for group pictures and Desiree wanted a picture together. I had already put the timer on for the group picture, and I thought I'd turned it off for this. But I hadn't. So we had to pose for 10 seconds. And Desiree sat there saying "Cheese!" The whole 10 seconds. Oh! Desiree can spell STOP and she points out stop signs and such. She is also becoming more observant. I pick the girls up for church on Sundays, and this past Sunday she asked me, as we were driving along, why "those signs" have numbers on them. So I explained to her about speed limits.

So we took a group shot before Christina had to leave. Being in retail, she had to work at 4 a.m. on Black Friday. So they ate and headed out pretty much. But we got a group shot.

I also had a ton of toys and such for the kids. Mostly they were things I forgot to give them at Halloween. Like stretchy glow in the dark skeletons. Actually, those I got on sale after Halloween. But I had glow-in-the-dark bats and various-colored vampire teeth. The kids loved that. They all put the teeth in, including Emily! (And including Aunt Hila). Maybe I will post them tomorrow (or in my next post...) if Christina sends them to me. All those pictures are on her camera. I told you, I did a really bad job of picture-taking this time! I also got to enjoy talking to Saria about books she is reading. She loves reading and reads well above her grade level. I am proud of her. After everyone left except me, Brad's family and I watched A B.C. Thanksgiving and A B.C. Christmas. I love those cartoons. The kids chuckled, but mostly when the grown-ups laughed. I think the cartoons are geared more toward adults. And they are hilarious. I headed home around 8:30 and didn't actually go to bed until midnight, though I had definitely intended to go to bed way earlier. Not only did I have to work at the funeral home the following day, but I'd also committed to go to Black Friday sales with Rebecca! And we agreed to meet at the funeral home at 3 in the morning! Gross!

So my alarm went off at 2:30 in the a.m. I texted Rebecca to see if we were still meeting at 3. I secretly hoped she'd say she wanted to meet up later (or not at all... hahaha). But we were still on. (Though she later admitted she had wanted to beg off, but didn't want to let me down...). So we hit Kohl's a little after 3 in the morning. Then we went and got hot chocolate. Then we drove around and ended up back at the mall. And walked around. Then we went to eat at this place called Shari's. At like 5 in the morning. I looked like death warmed over. Then we hit Target. Which we promptly left when we saw the check-out lines wrapping around aisles in the back of the store... Then we went to Wal-Mart and Fred Meyer. I did pretty well. Other than the breakfast and cocoa, I only spent $20. And $10 of that was Emily's Christmas present. I got her one of those sing-a-ma-jig things. If you don't know what they are, you should go look for them in the toy section. They are hilarious! I kept making it sing the notes, so I finally had to wrap it so I wouldn't kill the batteries before Emily could play with it on Christmas. Then I also bought 2 movies for $5 each. New movies :). And then it was time for work. Yeah, so I worked a full day at the funeral home, as did Rebecca, after we went shopping at 3 in the morning. Blech! I slept well that night. By 10:30 I couldn't even keep my eyes open. I was trying to read, and it wasn't happening, so I finally gave up.

Saturday I had to work at the library. Which I thought was pointless. The library was closed Sunday and Monday because it always is. Closed Tuesday due to the ice and snow. Open Wednesday (again, pointless). Closed Thursday and Friday for Thanksgiving. Open Saturday. And closed Sunday and Monday again for regular schedule. I thought it was dumb to have us in on that Saturday. But nobody asked me... I had my annual evaluation, which went fine. The day went pretty quick. Then I came home and actually went out and started pulling up my garden. It's the first Saturday afternoon I've had to do it. I still have to till it all under, but all the plants have been pulled, except the strawberries, and I won't pull those. Saturday night I had a dinner and movie night with Heidi and Wendy. We had Bistro Chicken in Rich Cream sauce (which I made out of my new crock pot cookbook), quinoa, brussel sprouts, orange julius to drink, and chocolate trifle for dessert. And we watched The Importance of Being Earnest (which to me is silly. I read the play back in 2006 for my English degree, and I thought it was absurd then... And I know it's mean to be...) and we also watched New In Town, which I loved! That was so funny! But it was a romantic comedy (ie chick flick), so of course I enjoyed it.

Sunday was church. Like I mentioned, we took the girls to church. Emily was more of a pill than usual. But when we gave her snacks and things to color, she settled down. Desiree is always so good. She is just such an easy-going, even-keeled kid. Not that Emily is awful. She really isn't. She just likes things to go her way sometimes (don't we all?) and she is still learning how to convey those wishes and frustrations.

Monday I worked all day at the funeral home. And then left at 4:30 like I always do, so I could get ready for Marvelous Monday Meals (or as we have started calling it: 3M). We had autumn chicken over egg noodles (another from my crock pot book. It was okay. Not as flavorful as I'd hoped, though Lea's family seemed to like it), homemade cream corn, Sis. Schubert rolls, and rich chocolate bars for dessert. Plus Lea has her Christmas tree up already, so it seemed so cozy to see it lit up in the corner as we laughed and watched Scrubs.

And today. This brings us up to date. For now :). It was a typical Tuesday for me. Lots and lots of rain the last two days. Lame. But at least it's not snow :). After works, I walked with Sue, ate dinner, got application stuff ready for a job, and finished up making oreo truffles. I have a love/hate relationship with those things. I love to eat them and give them to others to eat. I hate to make them. With a passion. If only they weren't so awesome-tasting, I would never feel the need to make them. Like ever. This batch is for the cookie swap we are doing at the library Christmas party this Friday.

So, I totally put reading and emailing my friends on the back-burner to write this blog. Which turned out quite lengthy. More-so than I had planned. So forgive me Julie, Annie, April, and Julia-Ann. You were on my list tonight, believe me. But oreo truffles, job applications, and blogging happened. And then it was 11 p.m. And my eyes hurt.

In Everything Give Thanks

What an interesting week it has been! Winter has come early to the Pacific Northwest, as you may have seen in the prior post. It has been a deep freeze here, and to say we, as a county, were unprepared is an understatement. Nobody was expecting the snow to stick on the ground on Monday. And nobody was expecting the never-above-freezing temperatures we are still experiencing. This makes for icy roads, by the way. Nobody was expecting to spend 8 hours to try to get out of town, if they needed to go (you can ask my brother about that one... In 3 hours on Monday night, he moved about 100 feet, and ended up getting home at 3 in the morning -- he had left his house at 3 in the afternoon (he was called in to work) and never even got out of town -- and then only because the police finally came and made a u-turn route so everyone could avoid the freeway, where the on-ramps were so iced over that people were skiing in cars...). Accompanying these frozen temperatures were howling winds. I never heard the official speed of the wind gusts, but I do know that they were incredibly strong. We lost power at the house for about 30 seconds. Lea's house lost power at 6 p.m. Monday night. Thousands and thousands of residents in my county (which was hit the worst by the windstorm) were out of power for over a day.

But as this is a day of Thanksgiving -- and a week of Thanksgiving, I will tell you the reasons for which I have given thanks this week, in spite of some of the craziness.

I am thankful for fun new traditions with new friends. As many of you may already know, Lea's family and I have a Monday night tradition known as Marvelous Monday Meals. Also Lea's daughter's boyfriend Dan comes too. It has been incredibly fun. We try new recipes (and hope for the best ;)). We have had Swedish meatballs, Philly Cheesesteaks, brocolli salad, creamy tortellini soup, chicken taco soup, chicken cordon bleu, etc.. For dessert we have had apple taffy pizza, chocolate trifle, coka cola cake, baked Alaska, etc. It has been a scrum-diddly-umptious time and entirely fun! We usually enjoy dessert while watching episodes of Scrubs. And every week, this is the highlight of Monday. Her whole family talks about it. I have an album of it on facebook, and will be making a cookbook from our Monday meals (with pictures!) soon.

And so this past Monday, I was making slow-cooker White Chili. And so the snow was kind of putting a cramp in Marvelous Monday Meals plans, which can never be a good thing! But with the snow starting to stick around 2 p.m., and me leaving the funeral home at 3 so I could make it home safely (studded tires or not, I'm not an experienced snow and ice driver, so I didn't want to be taking any chances), it was looking like a strong possibility that we would be cancelling Marvelous Monday Meals. And that was tragic. But in the end, we found an alternate solution :). And so Lea's husband and son came and picked me up (Dan was already at the house from after school). With hot chili in hand, and everything to spend the night at her house (including 2 chick flicks to watch, because I was pretty confident I wouldn't be going to either job the following day...), I piled into the truck and we made our way to Lea's. We actually didn't encounter any driving problems, but we saw the southbound freeway traffic, and that was grid-locked! Of course, we arrived at Lea's, and there was no power! Which meant we didn't have any cornbread muffins to go with our chili. But everyone was so happy to have the warm chili. And we anticipated that the power would be on in no time, and we could snack on cornbread muffins and the cinnamon cobblestone muffins that were to be dessert while watching Scrubs. Because they've lived in their house for about 10 years now, and they've never been without power more than 30 minutes. So we were optimistic. And, because I had thought to charge my laptop at home and to bring it with me, we rigged it up with speakers, and watched episodes of Scrubs while we settled in to wait for power. By 10, we were ready to turn in. We were bundled up. And we still had no power. But we figured it would come on during the night. It was 61 degrees inside when we went to bed. And the following morning, when we woke up to no power, it was 51 degrees inside! YIKES! So we walked around in blankets and coats. Hahaha. I called in and both jobs were closed. So there was no problem there. Didn't have to worry about being anywhere. Turned out we were in a stretch of the city that didn't have power, but the grocery store about 3 minutes away had power. So Lea's husband, daughter, and son went to the grocery store and got hot chocolates and coffees for everyone. Which makes me think of one of my thankfuls: I'm so thankful to live in a time of modern convenience!! And that, even though we were living without power and cold, there were some people who were not, and so we had options. I think I was born in the right time. I simply don't think I was cut out for days of no electricity. I am also thankful that, even without power, the toilets still flushed. I love indoor plumbing. Again, something without which I don't think I could function :). Or at least not well ;). So here are me and Lea. We had been up for a while, but I had only just put in my contacts, hence my tired-eyes. At this point, Lea had managed to get out of her warm bed and make it to the couch where she piled up the blankets. Hahaha.
As the day wore on, we decided we were hungry. And since power was not coming back, we improvised. Chuck thought of the bbq grill. And believe it or not, we had eggs, bacon, and toast (along with hot water boiled on the grill for more hot chocolate or coffee, and for washing dishes!). And so, here's a thing for which to be thankful: it gave me an idea of a way to do things when power is out. I think I need to invest in a charcoal grill and charcoal! And besides that, it was fun! It was an adventure!

After eating, we still didn't have power. So the whole chick-flick plan went out the window. We kept laughing and saying, "Don't the power people understand that their lack of hooking up power here is affecting our watching chick-flicks!?!" These are important things, people. But we decided to entertain ourselves with games. We ended up playing Skip-Bo. And that was fun. But here we are, all bundled up: me, Lea, Xavier, Morgan, and Dan. Chuck was still outside playing Survivor: Tundra. Hahaha. And so, I'm thankful for non-electrical entertainment! And for friends with whom to enjoy those non-electrical entertainments :). Even when we're frigidly cold (did I mention it was 29 degrees outside)!

We continued to be hopeful about the restoration of power. It didn't happen. And by this point, it was 4 p.m., and starting to get darker outside, and colder, and the temperature inside had dropped to 49 degrees. So here I am, texting people to see how they were holding up, all bundled up. And so I'm thankful for technology that allows us to keep in touch when the power is out (at least through the end of battery life ;)). And I'm also thankful that almost all of the time, I have a warm house. And even in this case, where we weren't enjoying heat at the moment, we were out of the elements, and that is such a blessing too! And we had tons of blankets and coats and sweaters and socks to keep us bundled up and as warm as possible.

But with the temperature dropping and still no heat or power -- and no more hot water either -- it was time to get me home and time for Lea's family to find a warm place to stay for the night. So Chuck drove me home. Dan went home (and got there safe, thankfully, in spite of incredibly icy roads and a huge slip down a big hill and the need to walk home to get his dad to help get his truck out). And Lea and her family found a friend with plenty of room and heat where they could stay for the night.

In spite of my greatest hopes, both of my jobs were open on Wednesday. And the roads weren't horrible. Temperatures remained below freezing, so nothing was melting. But the roads were surprisingly clear. So I went to both jobs. And arrived safely. I left the funeral home at 4, because my mom had bought tickets to The Forgotten Carols in Seattle. Lea went with us. And we had such fun! We walked on the ferry on the way over. Took a taxi (witha driver who ran a red light) to Benaroya Hall (which I keep calling Benny Hana Hall -- I just can't seem to get it right!), and got in and waited. And took pictures.

The show was fabulous!!! Plenty of humor. A sweet message. Beautiful music and talented singers! It was awesome! I'm so glad we went :). When it let out, we caught a cab back to the ferry terminal. He was another crazy driver. He went really fast down steep hills and scraped the car. But we arrived in once piece ;). We ate gourmet for dinner (at 10:00 at night) called McDonald's. Hahaha. Well, that was what was open late by the ferry! Turns out the Subway sandwiches inside the terminal was open too, but we didn't know that! So here are me and Lea on the ferry home. In the background (though you can't really seem him) is this dude that had blue and white long dredlocks in a mohawk-type thing. He didn't have hair anywhere else but the down the middle of his head. The weirdest thing is that he was on the ferry on the way over to Seattle with us, we saw him in the ticket line as soon as we all got into the ferry terminal when we arrived in Seattle, like he was buying a ticket back, and then when we got back after the show, he was in the terminal again, and was riding the ferry back with us! It was bizarre! We are wondering if he just rides the ferry back and forth for kicks on a Wednesday night. Hahaha...

So we dropped Lea off after a fun and laughter-filled ferry ride home. And then we got home at about midnight.

I've also pondered some deep thoughts this week (and some not-so-deep). Like why are eggs (huevos) and nuts (nueces) not equal across languages? Or like why does my good memory have to encompass the bad memories as well? I don't have an answer for the first question. But for the second, I think I do. I think that, even though I would often rather forget some of the more painful memories of my life, perhaps they are there and will remain there as a reminder. A reminder that I don't want to feel those things again. A prevantative measure so that I won't make the same mistakes again. And for that, I can definitely be grateful.

So yeah, it's been an interesting week. Opportunities abounded to make the best out of a bad situation in many cases. And overall, I have been able to see so many things in my life for which I should be grateful. And today we will enjoy Thanksgiving with most of my family. And I will continue to be thankful for the things that I have. Because it's everything I need and so much more :). And I am reminded in 1 Thessalonians 5:18: "In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." I'm not just to be thankful in the good things, but in every thing. Even the hard moments that bring life's lessons. Because, as the Lord reminds me in D&C 122:7: "all these things shall give [me] experience, and shall be for [my] good."

Do You Know...

....I still go walking when it's literally freezing outside? I just bundle up A LOT. You probably can't tell from this picture, but I'm wearing the hat, a t-shirt, a sweater, the coat with a hood, the pants, and pajama pants underneath the pants to add extra warmth for my legs.
...that these are not snow shoes? Yeah. When I left the house this morning, we knew it would be snowing. Because it already was. But it wasn't sticking to the ground, and we didn't anticipate that it would. So I figured I was okay in these. At 3 this afternoon, when I left work (early due to snow), I got the affirmation that I should always listen to my mom... And wear smart shoes.

...what a 32" flat screen tv looks like? It looks like this: Plus 3 others just like it. In case you can't tell, these are studded snow tires. And I am the (questionably) proud owner of a new set. And my tv plans went out the window... But at least I'm still out of debt. And the truth is, what good is a tv or vacation money if I die because I didn't have studded tires for the crazy winter we are predicted to have (and it looks like their predictions were spot-on, even though I had hoped they were just making it up for kicks and giggles...).

...that I can still smile when freezing cold, a bit bent out of shape about my tv, and a little annoyed with Mother Nature for giving us yet another bad winter (starting before Thanksgiving) in a place where they supposedly don't get bad winters but once every 20 years? Yeah, I can. Here's proof.

Yep. It's going to be a baaaad winter.

Thirtysomething

Well, I haven't aged a whole year in 3 weeks, even if it might feel like I have ;). Nah, I'm still only 30. But to "celebrate" the whole idea of turning 30, I decided to check out the tv series Thirtysomething from the library. Now, I didn't just randomly come up with this idea. I just happened to see one of the seasons come through my library for a hold request. And, though I hadn't actually watched the show in my youth (I mean, come on... it came out in 1987. Which means I was about 7), I do remember that it came on SCN a couple of times and I think my parents may have watched an episode or two. Why I remember anything about the show at all, I do not know. But I do know that I vividly remember seeing the opening credits on tv at least once.

So when I saw one of the DVD sets come through the library, I kind of wondered if I could identify with the characters in the show, now that we had fast-forwarded about 23 years. And so I put the first season on hold. At age 29. And I'm up to season 3 at age 30. I like the show. And yes, I do identify with the characters now, by the way. Almost all of them.

Because I know what it's like to deal with the issues that arise in an interfaith marriage.

And I know what it's like to watch your marriage fall apart.

And I know what it's like to be 30-something and single and have desires for marriage and motherhood and not know if those desires will ever be fulfilled.

And I know what it's like to make plans for a career and have those plans not work out quite as I planned.

And I know what it's like to be in my 30s and not quite feeling like an adult in some ways -- or certainly not feeling like I'm living like one!

And there are other issues on the show. Ones with which I can't exactly identify, but which I know exist. Like miscarriages. Or parenting. Or being a driven career-woman to the exclusion of almost all else.

And I laugh! Because when the show came out all those years ago and it caught my attention for a split second (long enough to have made a lasting impression), it held no interest for me at all! I was 6! I didn't even know those issues existed! But they existed for my parents. Not all, but some. And even those my parents didn't experience, they were aware of them. And now, the same can be said of me. How weird! When did I get old enough to identify with these characters? I was telling Lea this the other day, and I said, "I'll tell you what this means: it means I'm old!" Hahaha. Childhood is such an innocent time. And somehow, in 20+ years, I gained life experience, maturity, and knowledge so that I can now cope with the adult things. But sometimes... Sometimes I miss the innocence.

Some of the Dumb Things I Do...

I don't know about you, but sometimes I do things that are classically dumb. But it's funny, so I'm cool with it. I enjoy a good laugh, even if it's because of something dumb I've done :).

There was the time I stuck my finger in real cheesecake at a restaurant because I thought it was plastic (and in a very authoritative and assured voice had told someone that it was...). You can read about that here.

And I know there are a million others. Sadly, my mental path is not guiding me very well down memory lane at the moment.

But here's a recent one for you...

So last Thursday I went to a little birthday celebration for my friend Wendy. Several ladies from church got together and we did a potluck thing and then played a game. This was a new game for me, I'd never heard of it before. But it was way fun! It's called Time's Up! Essentially, you get all these cards and you have to try to make your team members guess who is on the card. The name on the card might be historical, a musician, fictional, a sports person, etc. And the first round, you can say whatever you want (exept for the name and a few other rules) and your team can guess as many times as you want. But you can't pass. You have to stay on that card until your team guesses it or you run out of time. So it was my turn. We were moving along quite nicely. And then I get this card. Gracious alive! How is one to describe the person on the card if one doesn't know who that person is?!? So, I am grasping at straws. I know my clues are way off base, because I know for a fact that the person on the card isn't in any way related to the story of Icarus and the wings and flying to close to the sun and the wax on the wings melting and the boy falling and dying. (Moral of that story: listen to your parents, folks ;)). Anyway, I know that that has nothing to do with the name on the card. But it's all I can think of! I keep hoping they will hear the story about wings and melting from flying too close to the sun and think "Icarus!" And then I'm hoping they will make the jump from that name to the name on the card (which ends in 'arus'). Alas, it didn't happen. My time was up, so I had to pass the deck to the next team. Well, they get a fresh card, so the card I had went to the back of the pile of 20 cards each team was trying to "win." Well, when it got to be our turn again, that same card came up, but someone else on my team was reading the cards and trying to get us to name the person. So Heidi says, "Christ raised him from the dead!" And someone else on the team yells, "Lazarus!" And I was like, "Oh my gosh!" It was a proud moment for me... I felt like the biggest dummy on the planet (because this was the card I'd been struggling with earlier). Here I am hoping they will make a jump from Icarus to Lazarus! I'm in Greek legends and myths and the truth is it's Biblical! And I'm playing with a bunch of church ladies! Classic. So I totally 'fessed up to this. Because, though embarassing, it was funny. So that became the laugh of the night. Well, one of them. Because watching Wendy and Kristin act out "Cruella De Vil" without words was awesome. Listening to Wendy's mom whisper an answer in one round (as though we wouldn't hear it or it wouldn't count if it was wrong if it was whispered) was hilarious. And watching Crystal do charades to make us guess Stephen Hawking... Yeah, it was a fun night.

And for the record, I do know the story of Lazarus being raised from the dead. I just didn't connect the name on the card with that story. But I can assure you, I will never ever forget the whole thing for the rest of my life ;).

Aside from that sweet story...

Desiree was in the Primary Program on Sunday. She is so sweet. I cannot believe she is almost 6. It just doesn't seem right. She is such a sweet girl. There she was in front of the whole congregation, and she wasn't even scared. When I sing with the choir, she always waves at me from our pew. She gets so excited to see me up there. So this Sunday was her turn, and I waved at her :). Meanwhile Emily has mastered the word "no." And "gank you!"

Take Out the Papers and the Trash!

My friend Virginia once told me she heard a theory that a cluttered living space was a sign of a cluttered mind. I can totally buy that. And I've decided it's time to de-clutter my life. In all ways. I'm ready to take control. To stop letting life just happen.

I feel like I just waded through the week from hell. And I can't even really pinpoint what so royally sucked about the week. But something really did (there's a good possibility it was hormonal...). It felt like every time I would tell myself I would be positive and try again fresh each new day, that life would kick me. And kick me again. And it turns out, I'm not the only one who experienced such a cruddy week. It seems so many people I know are going through some massive trials. And sometimes that just really, really stinks.

I guess sometimes it takes some real tough times to force a person to make changes. And most of the time that isn't easy. Sometimes, in the end, we have to let go of the way we thought things would be and aren't. Sometimes we have to accept the way things turned out and go from where we are. Sometimes we have to watch a dream shatter. But then sometimes we just have to realize that what one of my favorite quotes from 10 years ago claims is true: That dreams are funny... Sometimes they come true differently than we expect.

And, frankly, I have too much to do in my life to just sit and wait for it to happen. If I want to write, then I need to write. I have recently read over some old blog posts, from when I was in Tuscaloosa and I wrote nearly every day (largely due to the type of job I had at the time...). My writing was more fluid. It just sounded better. And so I guess what they (they being authors) say is true: if you want to write, you have to write every day. There's obviously a reason for that.

If I want to go see the Eiffel Tower and the Great Pyramids and take a cruise through the Panama Canal, then I need to make it happen. I have the passport. I just need to save up the money. And I don't need to wait for my knight in shining armor to show up so that we can go together. Forget it. Because I may waste my life waiting for that.

I have a whole bucket list I need to tend to. And I'm going to start. Because one thing I've learned over the past few years about myself is that I can do hard things. I may not enjoy it. But I can do it. I pursued and earned a master's degree, and in order to do so, I had to move away from everyone and everything I knew at a very very difficult time in my life. And while I was there, I thrived. I had hard days, sure. But I was able to do what I went there to do, and I was able to do it without going into further debt. I also proved to myself this past year that I can accomplish other goals I set. While I have not done everything I set out to do this year, I have done a lot of it. And that helps me know I can in the future as well. And so I will set my goals, and I will cross those items off my bucket list. But first, it's time to take out some papers and some trash :). Because I'm starting with physical clutter first!

True That

I got this quote from Leighann. She is my friend Karen's daughter. She had it on her facebook, and I really really like it.

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass… It’s about learning to dance in the rain!”

There's a lot of rain in Washington these days. And you can take that however you want to. Because it's true either way.

Tricky Tricky Halloweeny

Yeah, so I'm a week late in getting this posted. What can I say? It's been a busy and exhausting week. And tonight I'm looking forward to a snuggly cozy evening at home, reading. Which is why I will go heavy on the pictures and light on the diatribe (which is so un-Nilla). The Halloween Party went off well. We opted to do it on Sunday to give the kids that one extra day of wearing their costumes, since they all took the kids trunk-or-treating at the church on Saturday night. Christina went as a character from the series True Blood, which is a vampire show. She was bitten by a vampire. I did my 80s thing. And by some stroke of luck, I could fit into that skirt. Barely. And here are Brad and Tarylyn as well, while I'm there cutting up booberry treats.
And then I went all psycho. For the sake of Halloween. But this is really how I felt this week.

The food. I've become more and more minimalist as the years have passed. I think the amount of food is inversely proportional to the number of jobs I have. Or maybe not. But it sounded intelligent :). All mathy.

Here are Nick and Christina. With some very awesome punch in the background, if I do say so myself. It's my new favorite punch recipe. We were going to do a brain ice mold in that punch. It didn't happen.

Here are me and Christina.

And me and Samuel. That is one stinkin' cute kid. He was King Boo (from Mario Bros.) for Halloween. But he got hot in his costume. You will see him in it shortly.

Me and Benjamin. Benjamin was Toad from SMB.

Me and Desiree. Desiree was a fairie. A specific fairie. But bad Aunt Hila can't remember which one...

Me and Saria. Saria was Toadette from SMB.

And me and Emily. Who was a pixie. But she kept tearing her wings off.

And here I am with all the kiddos in their costumes. Samuel is always making hilarious facial expressions.

And this was me in the whole outfit after I got home. If you notice, I'm wearing leg warmers. These were from April. I'm glad I have friends who know my love of all things 80s. Because all the accessories were given to me by Julie and April. I even have pink slotted glasses. Which I had taken with me, and I forgot to put on for this picture. Oops!

So yeah, it was a fun evening. We enjoyed the yummy food and each other's company. And we filmed a video clip of the family saying "Have a Nice Weekend!" a la SCN from back in the day. Someone is trying to get a bunch of submissions and put them all together just like it used to be on the old Southern Command Network in Panama. And so we threw ours into the pot. The kids thought it was the coolest thing ever. And, quite frankly, so did I. In case you're interested in what I'm talking about, click here. This brings back memories from many a Friday afternoon of my childhood.