Sunday, July 26, 2015

Out of the Mouths of Babes

As I've mentioned before, I am pretty sure I will learn a lot from my kids...

Particularly what I do that isn't the best.  Because Lynnaea mimics me.  A lot.

Her latest thing?  Well, let's just say when I get frustrated with Jeremy, I tend to say (in a somewhat whiney voice), "Jeremy!"

And let's just say Lynnaea has recently started saying the exact same thing in the exact same way when he is frustrating her...  I don't think she quite realizes that she is calling her daddy by his name though (she still calls him daddy at all other times).  I say this, because last Sunday in nursery, another little boy kept taking her puzzle pieces.  She turned to him and said, "Jeremy!"  In that same whiney tone.  So basically, I think she uses it as a word to express her frustration with someone.  Hahaha. 

Mostly I just wanted to record this for posterity's sake.  These are the stories it will be fun to tell her in the years ahead!

The other hilarious thing she did the other day was not so much mimicking what I say so much as what I do.  Though things are the same as they were with Lynnaea (in regards to nursing) and I don't produce enough milk to sustain Corbin's life by just breast-feeding (though I do produce more this time around), I am still nursing as much as I can.  Hoping to keep it going until at least the 6 month mark, as I did with Lynnaea.  Anyway, the other day she wanted to feed him his bottle, so I let her do that for a few minutes.  She said she was all done, so I took him back.  And then she said she wanted to feed him again and started lifting up her shirt...  She said she wanted to feed him out of her belly-button.  Which is the only thing on her torso that sticks out, so she thinks that will work.  She's also been known to walk around with one of the breast shields for the breast pump (one of our many extra ones) on her belly-button, because she saw me pumping when we first brought him home...  Oh she is a sweet one.
Just a picture of Corbin the other day.  He is usually happy on the changing table (as Lynnaea was when she was a baby).  There's just something about that place!
I was trying to catch Corbin's smile...  This is a sort-of smile.  And you can see at least one of his dimples (he has one in each cheek ;)).
It's been a while since Lynnaea and I took a selfie.  Sow e did that today.
And then we got Corbin in on the selfie-action.  He's a little unseasoned ;).

Sunday, July 19, 2015

It's a Bittersweet Symphony -- Take 2

I haven't done a song title post in a while.  And this is one I've done before.  When my life was changing in a huge way.  You can read that here, if you feel so inclined.

The longer I live, the more I realize how true it is...  Life is full of bittersweet moments.  Last week I got to experience a new one. 

You see, my little girl has spent the last two years being rocked to sleep by yours truly.  A bad habit?  Yeah.  Turns out it was.  I thought I was doing a great job, because I would get her almost completely to sleep while rocking her and singing I am a Child of God.  Then I'd lay her in her bed and she'd roll over and go to sleep. 

...And then Corbin came along.  And this night-time routine was taking 30 to 45 minutes.  And then I'd lay her in the bed thinking she was asleep enough.  And she'd immediately open her eyes and start crying "rock rock!"  And so...  We had to sleep train our toddler in the weeks Jeremy was home from work.  That was a fun (sarcastic) and heart-breaking 4 days.  I don't like to listen to my babies cry.  The good news is it only took 4 days and it got less traumatic each day.  I would go in, rock her and sing the song through (all 4 verses) 1 time.  Then put her in bed and tuck her in and kiss her goodnight.  And this became our new routine. 

...Which lasted all of 2 weeks.  Then suddenly, last Sunday, it changed.  She didn't want me to carry her to her room.  She didn't want me to rock her.  She just wanted to climb into her bed on her own  and I could cover her.  She gives me kisses and hugs and tells me she loves me and night-night. 

She doesn't know that I cried for the first two nights after I left her room.

My little girl needs me less and less.  And I know it is good for her to grow up.  It is good for her to be able to go to sleep on her own (frankly, we've had less mid-night waking and no screaming in the middle of the night since she started going to sleep on her own).  But there is still that little piece of my mother heart that is broken.  Because rocking my Lynnaea and singing to her was my favorite part of the day.  It was precious time for just she and I.  And now it is gone.  We still read our stories together before she goes to bed, though, and she still sits on my lap at that time.  And I will cherish that for as long as I can.

Of course, then she also goes and does awesome toddler stuff like stick a little tiny elastic hair "pretty" (the kind I put in her hair) up her nostril so far I have to get a flashlight and tweezers to get it out...  Yeah, that's fun too.  We followed that up with a conversation of why we don't stick stuff up our noses.  I'm hoping she understood...

As for Corbin.  He is growing like a weed.  Seriously.  I had a friend ask me at church today, "He isn't even 3 months yet is he?"  She was commenting about how alert he is for his age.  I replied, "He isn't even two months yet."  He's just a big boy.  He is 6 weeks today.  He is smiling on purpose, and it's adorable.  He is awake more, and I'm trying really hard to create a routine for him.  Jeremy starts swing shift this week, so I'm going to try transitioning him to his little bedside crib in the hopes I can return to my own bed to sleep after more than 6 weeks of sleeping with him the recliner. 

Honestly, part of me doesn't want to give up having him sleep on me.  Each night in the recliner, as I look down at him asleep on my chest, I feel happiness and peace.  But I also feel like a walking zombie every 2 hours when he wakes up or gets restless -- and I think sometimes he is just restless but doesn't need to eat; but since he wakes me up, I automatically assume (in my sleep-deprived state) that he is hungry.  So I fix the bottle.  If he isn't sleeping on me, maybe I won't wake up when he's restless and only if/when he cries from hunger.  Because lately I've had to "wake him up" to eat after the bottle is ready.  So yes, it will be bittersweet for these moments to end too...  But I know more sleep will do me wonders.  I often wake up disoriented at first and trying to remember if we are in the recliner or not.  I don't really like that feeling. 

Anyway... Just a few pictures of recent adventures.  Like Northwest Trek and the Bug Museum.  And 5 of the grandkids all together ;).
Lynnaea feeding her baby brother.  She likes to help.  But she also likes to hold him for about 30 seconds max.  Then she says "all done."  and it's best if you're standing at the ready, because she pretty much wiggles out from under him in a flash...
I do love a side-ways picture.  Thanks blogger!  Anyway, you can see he's keeping his eyes open more.
Sweet kiddos!  They had fun playing that day.
Doing a new toddler activity I thought would be awesome:  making rainbow toast.  Basically you "paint" your bread with colored milk and then broil it.  I thought Lynnaea would love eating it.  she pretty much licked off the nutella and didn't want to eat the toast...  But she had fun with the painting part.
On the tram at Northwest Trek.  She loved seeing the animals.  It was kind of a rough day for the mommy....  But Lynnaea loved it, and I did it for her.
Corbin slept through pretty much all of the Northwest Trek...
And there she is with this lizard thing at the bug museum, which is just down the hill from our house.  Hadn't been before so we checked it out.  She loved talking to the lizards in the tanks.  She wanted to hold them all.  Clearly she is nothing like me...
Corbin, the last dinosaur ;)...  He was thrilled.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Corbin - 1 Month

Dear Corbin,

Time is a funny thing.  In some ways, this past month has seemed interminable.  The sleepless nights will do that to you!  In other ways, the past month has gone so quickly.  I see you every day and don't notice how you're growing, but looking back at your newborn pictures, I can certainly see how you've grown!  And how you've developed.  You smile now.  And you're awake so much more these days. 

I can't say it's all been roses.  It's been a challenge for me to be a mommy to 2 who are so young.  But we have managed to muddle through.  Thankfully, Daddy was home for 4 weeks to help with everything.  And we're starting to find our groove.  But the nights are still hard for me.  Mostly because I can't sleep whenever you do during the day :).  Your big sister needs my love and attention too, and she's awake during the day.  So sometimes I feel zombie-like.  But I know these days will end.  And, on some level, I will miss them.

And so I can honestly say that I love that we are sleeping together in the recliner these days (actually, they're nights).  I feel like it's some of our best snuggle time -- and something I didn't really do with Lynnaea (we didn't have a recliner then...).  I know I regretted not enjoying the snuggle phase with Lynnaea as much and so I have tried to really relish that with you.  There really is something wonderful about having you snuggled up on my chest sleeping. 

You are pretty serious about your food, Mr. Corbin.  You eat every two hours, pretty much like clockwork.  It's amazing.  You can also scream with the best of them...  You let us know when we aren't coming fast enough for your liking.  And when I'm home alone with both you and Lynnaea, often I can't come as fast as either of us would like.  And boy do you ever give me the what-for!  It's like you know how much I hate hearing my baby cry, even when it has to happen for a couple of minutes. 

We've had some ups and downs with things like nursing.  You weren't the best latcher initially.  Which meant I got some owies.  And we had to stop nursing for a while.  But we persevered through that, and we are now a successful nursing team!  There were many days I wanted to give up, but having reached this point, I'm glad that I didn't.  It's some time that is just for you and me, and I think that's really nice and important. 

You love bath-time.  The first two baths we gave you, you weren't such a fan.  But ever since then, you've liked the bath!  Which is totally awesome.  You sit there as content as can be until the bath is over (at which point Lynnaea is usually trying to splash you, and then you're done!).  You have been smiling for a couple of weeks, but the smiles are getting better and better as you learn more and more how to control yourself.  And you hold your head up really well -- you have since birth!  We attribute it to your large size at birth.  Daddy says maybe you should have been born a week earlier ;). 

I love you Corbin.  I don't have the same amount of one-on-one time to give you as I did your sister.  And I often feel guilty about that.  But I love you.  And I hope you'll always know that.  It is different to parent a second child.  My attention is divided and things I want to do (like write your 1-month blog post letter) get pushed back and back and back until the day is almost done.  But I will do my best to give you as much as I can.  I will fail at times.  I am only human.  But I will try.  I will try to just sit and hold you and look into your eyes when that's what you need most.  I will smile as you smile at me, because those are beautiful wonderful moments.  And I will hold you close when you just need some snuggles.  Because you are my boy.  And I'm so grateful you are.

Love Always,

Bath-time is good times ;)!
I have a couple of awesomely talented friends who made me a sling so I could survive Jeremy going back to work!  And they even made one for my mini-me!!
Today's 1-month pictures.