Living the Dream

I have at least 2 blog posts that are in draft form and may or may not ever get finished and published.  How's that for getting things done ;)! 

Last night, as I sat on the couch reading, I heard Lynnaea call for me.  It was about 10:30, and I was getting close to my bed-time and the time I would go in to get Lynnaea to go potty one last time for the night.  (This has been wildly successful.  She hasn't had a night-time accident in at least a month.)  But I heard her call for me, so went in and got her.  She was mostly in a sleeping-state still, so we went potty and then I took her and held her with me on the couch. 

As her little body curled up on me, as I looked down at her not-so-little legs (they got so long all of a sudden... when did that happen?), I thought again of how fleeting these moments are.  And I reminded myself -- again -- that this is what's important right now. 

Not the book I want to write.

Or how I want to see my small business boom.

Or how I want to travel the world.

I am, literally, living the dream.  My dream.  Being a mother was the deepest desire of my heart. 

And yet, sometimes, I think about my other dreams.  I feel a pull to be successful in the eyes of the world -- a yearning to be more than just a mom.  And sometimes I allow that to blur what's really important. 

"What matters most is what lasts longest."  "No other success can compensate for failure in the home." 

Such wise words. 

Tonight, I enjoyed some me-time out with a couple of fabulous ladies.  Just an hour and a half, but it was perfect.  When I got home, Lynnaea ran to me saying, "Mommy!  You're home!"  The joy in her voice, on her face...  It was infectious.  Both she and Corbin wanted me to hold them.  And so I did.  Sometimes I forget how much their world revolves around me.  Not because I'm someone amazing.  But because I am their mommy.  There is no "just a mom" to them.  I am their mommy, and that's all they need me to be -- and all they want me to be.  Flawed as I am, they love me unconditionally.  I am living the dream.

There is nothing wrong with my other dreams.  But there will be time enough for them.  Someday.  When there are no little bodies to have curl up on me at night.  No mischievous little smiles coming my way right before little hands touch a "no-no."  For now, I'm living the best dream.  I'm choosing the better part.  I'm choosing them.  They are my dream come true.